
A Genuinely kind person never calls attention to their kindness. Their sweetness and gentle demeanor flow like honey or milk from them. They don’t try to be kind. I met a musician (Nawang Khechog) once who embodied kindness. He reflected on his mentor the 14th Dalai Lama who also embodies kindness.
Like you, I have met the real deal and the inauthentic kind person (who uses kindness as a tool of manipulation). And eventually, I became confused as to who I could trust. That’s when I turn to spiritual leaders who embodied generosity and compassion. And physically, their skin glows and smiles come easily to them (full smiles, not tight lip acknowledgments of a smile).
So if you find that you need a reminder of authentic kindness, I’m including a list here to get you started. You already know what it feels like to meet a genuinely kind person. They cause your eyes to mist. They inspire you to spread kindness in the world. They are a random act of kindness embodied.
- A genuinely kind person never tells you that they are “nice” or “kind,” and in fact, they don’t rely on words, but on kind acts. They make no promises and they don’t boast about their acts. There is little ego involved.
- They practice courtesy and always consider another person’s feelings. They don’t keep score of their kind deeds or expect courtesy from others. However, they greatly appreciate when others show them courtesy.
- They speak in quieter tones and practice humility.
- They look for ways to make the world a better place whether that’s joining a monastery or picking up litter on their local streets.
- Their presence is comforting and some cases, saintly or angelic.
I also add that the kind people I’ve met don’t expect anything in return. Yes, they won’t turn away your respect, courtesy or kindness, but if you’re in a bad mood, they don’t shout at you, use profanity, or treat you like you are “less than” perfect. They embody an understanding that we all face challenges. And kind people will offer a hug, an ear, or step out of the way like a great martial artist so that they are not hit by an ice storm.
May you be blessed with genuinely kind people who get you. We could all use more understanding. But Saint Francis of Assisi once said that it is better to understand than to be understood. The French-Italian saint embodied kindness.
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